I want you back.

This is from the movie "Talk to Her," the last one my mom ever saw,one or two weeks before she died. Sad, sad movie but i loved this song from the time i was a child, particularly the original version by the great Lola Beltran. Never knew it would mean exactly how i feel:


I can't stop listening to its many versions.
I really like this person's video for the same song, too. I came to my blog tonight to try to express "tears falling."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXzh1aD6bQ0

They say that at nights
all he did was cry
they say he didn't eat
all he did was drink
they swear that even the heavens
shuddered to hear his weeping
How he suffered for her
That even at his death he called for her

"Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay", he would sing
"Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay", he would wail
"Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay", he would sing
From a fatal passion he was dying

They say a sad dove in the early morning would go to sing
to the empty house, with its doors open wide
They swear that dove is nothing more than his soul,
who still waits for her return, the unfortunate one.

Cucurrucucú, dove
cucurrucucú, don't cry

Stones will never, dove
Know anything about love

Dicen que por las noches no más se le iba en puro llorar.
Dicen que no comía, no más se le iba en puro tomar.
Juran que el mismo cielo se estremecía al oír su llanto.
¡Cómo sufrió por ella, que hasta en su muerte la fue llamando!

"Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay", cantaba.
"Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay", gemía.
"Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay", cantaba.

De pasión mortal moría.
Que una paloma triste muy de mañana le va a cantar
a la casita sola con las puertitas de par en par.
Juran que esa paloma no es otra cosa más que su alma,
que todavía la espera a que regrese, la desdichada.

Cucurrucucú, paloma,
cucurrucucú, no llores.

Las piedras jamás, paloma,
qué van a saber de amores.

***
My mom and i always loved rancheras. We shared a love for Latin American music, especially tangos, rancheras, boleros and baladas. The music of heartache and love. Tears channelled into song. This is where i need to be, with the music that connects me to my mom. I wonder now how i could relate to this music, as a teen, without truly knowing what a broken heart feels like.

I have lots of plans for this year that i'm very excited and optimistic about, but at the end of the day, right now, she is still missing. I want her back. Or i want to go back.